I did not want to write about this because it’s pretentious and unbearably preachy but I also think it’s a very relevant topic and I want to try be and as real as possible.
To understand the depths of human relations, I have always played close attention to people and how they treat others but most importantly, themselves. How you treat people is a facade, it’s not completely who you are, your either pretending to be someone or hiding your true self to avoid judgement or both but you can tell a lot about people from how they are with themselves, which is completely transparent to their soul. Most often, negativity and hate is rooted because of neglect of own self or unhappiness that is derived from within, the external environment plays a huge role most time but not always. It’s subjective as to what is an ideal environment and what is not but the feelings are internal, the non-ideal situation just builds and adds weight to those feelings.
The people you hang out with and interact with play an important role in your mental health, by default. The loss or deviation from those relationships affect our mental health. Most people I meet are extremely pessimistic for no reason at all, there are people dying and some countries are still on War against each other and if you gained a wider perspective about the world you would realise how infinitesimally small most of our problems are and that it’s normal to feel negative emotions as long as you have the ability to snap out of it and positively move on from it.
My father, is by far the most positive and resilient person I have met while my mother, the most timid in the household agrees that I get my positive nature from my father and I have always been that way, I see the world through an innocent eyes which is why I can never see the bad, I always presume the best of people but I can identify ill-intentions immediately which works out fine most times but there has been times where I am completely engulfed in my self-absorbed misery due to my first world problems and I went through this phase in my life where I started writing letters to myself and I would put it in a white envelope that I made and throw it in a bag. These weren’t complaining statements or a letter describing what devious thing that had occurred, it’s just a letter that I wrote when I was sad about how I should not feel that way or self motivational talks, to myself by myself. I started this when in 2013 and my most recent was in January, I have a handful of letters by now and I cannot begin to explain how helpful or influential it has been in the past few months and looking back and re-reading those letters gave me an insight on how I’m always dealing with petty problems no matter if I’m 14 or 18 or 89. The nature of these letters is such that it does not remind of what I was going through when I wrote them or the incidents in my life in those timelines, it simply motivates it.
You can put 1000 quotes plastered all over your house by famous dead people but only you can control how you see, feel and behave to things and people. Positivity is not something that can be thought, it’s contagious but not necessarily transferred. Self-love and self-understanding is important and read a book, watch a film or travel around and experience how diverse the universe is, Depression, Anxiety etc is not cool, stop glamorizing it.